


Double Break Point

by resqueln



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, Snippets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-23
Updated: 2013-06-23
Packaged: 2017-12-15 23:03:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/855014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/resqueln/pseuds/resqueln
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock has an unwelcome epiphany.  Lestrade gets a bit of his own back.  </p><p>A Mystrade short.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Double Break Point

**Author's Note:**

> The title is tennis terminology. This story has absolutely nothing to do with tennis.

Sherlock stared in horror at Lestrade’s lapel. 

“What?” Lestrade asked, finally noticing.

“You and Mycroft are having sex,” Sherlock said, nose wrinkling in disgust. 

John choked on his surprise as Lestrade went pink under his tan. Sherlock wasted no time in jumping into an explanation.

“You are wearing cologne, something you only ever do when you’re in a relationship. Your clothes are impeccably creased, so either your partner has a higher domestic skill set than you or your clothes have been washed by a laundry service. Given the level of skill with which your collar has been pressed, a laundry service is more likely but it could go either way. You have glanced at your phone a total of twelve times since we arrived, indicating that you are arguing with someone whom can only text you infrequently – most likely due to a busy schedule. When I arrived you introduced me to the victim’s family but hesitated when you said ‘Holmes’ as if you were thinking of someone else with the same name. Finally you have a piece of blossom on your lapel, peculiar to the rare species of lilac situated in the front garden adjacent to Mycroft’s house.

My brother has no redeeming features and therefore I can only assume that you are either even stupider than I thought, insane, or that he has drugged you to get you to consent to such a hideous assignation. I know you have been having a dry spell, Lestrade, but is it really necessary for you to sink this low?”

Sherlock finally stopped talking. For a tense moment nobody spoke. Judging from the look on his face Greg really wanted to smack Sherlock one - not undeservedly - and John readied himself to intervene. Eventually, Greg shook himself, straightened up, and looked Sherlock straight in the eye.

“Your brother is a really, and I mean _really_ fantastic lay,” he said. 

Sherlock choked, eyes widening in surprise and John had to put a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing out loud. 

“Good looking too," Lestrade continued. "In fact he's really good with his hands –“

“DELETE!” Sherlock cried out, throwing his hands over his ears. “No more! My God, Lestrade, have you no mercy?!”

Lestrade smiled sunnily. “None. Your brother likes it that way.”

Sherlock let out a kind of garbled scream and flounced from the room in disgust. They watched him go.

“I quite enjoyed that,” Lestrade said with a grin.

“You and me both,” John said, smiling and sipping his tea.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh how sweet it must be to get one over on a Holmes brother. No pun intended. ;)
> 
> Relatively new to Sherlock fandom (omg so much good fic to read, why have I waited so long???). Cutting my teeth on some Mystrade. Hope this entertains!
> 
> Constructive criticism gratefully received as always.


End file.
